Short update

Dreams pass into the reality of action. From the actions stems the dream again; and this interdependence produces the highest form of living. +Anais Nin

I like the quote above a lot.was browsing through some blogs where I stumbled upon that.You guys must have think I have a lot of free time,always browsing and discovering new blogs.I dont really.When I'm on study break time at home,I read blogs.Am a bit lazy of watching dramas at times.I like to multi task.And hence,the usual routine is reading blogs and hearing songs.Hhehehehe.

I have 2 important update which I have not gushed about here.My Big Bang concert and Korea trip.Shall update them soon (by end of this month)!!

How's life so far? Loving my new hair cut.Ms.Lee made me a shoe as past of her holiday project.I am soo touched and LOVE it!! Which reminds me,am gonna do a bracelet for my friend's birthday.Am searching for the perfect charm for it. I bought 2 rings from Korea and am indecisive as to turning them into a charm for my necklace,wearing them as rings (i dont usually wear rings-not really a ring person) or turning it into a charm for a bracelet.Gahhhhhh.

Am catching up in my studies and trying to utilize my free time as beneficial as possible.I keep reminding myself everytime I feel like postponing revising that I dont want to regret like how I did last year and after hearing on how well others did,I feel ashamed and to be honest,tak syok.So,I am gonna give it my all to try and get a 2.1 honours and make myself and my family proud!!!


2ne1 cancelled their New Evolution concert in Malaysia and Indonesia.I am heart broken.Was about to decide to go for the concert alone ( I couldn't find a partner in crime to go with me T.T) and and feel missing this concert,I'm gonna regret big time.And I really like CL's solo stage in the concert.To see it like is crazy awesome!!! Am in dilemma now on whether  I should go to FMFA where Rita Ora,Temper Trap,FUN and PSY are among the few artists coming,which I wanna see.Bad thing,maybe going alone.(Well I do have a friend who is going,only thing is I'm not really close to him).Sis remark was''You're that desperate to go,till you sanggup to go with someone you're not that close?'' And she asked me to choose between this festival and Lee Hom ( who will be coming in March for a 2 day concert at Genting-where sis lans to buy a mahal punya tic to see him really closeeeee this time). *SIGH* how?!!!!!! Can someone give me some opinion? *criessssssss* I have seen Lee Hom for a few times now.Being able to see Rita Ora and the Temper Trap live is something I never dream on really.It's a rare opportunity really.How??!!!!! T.T

Music department on current love: Primary,Zion.T,Lee Hi,Epik High-Kill This Love, Calvin Harris ft.Ellie Goulding-I need your Love,Calvin Harris ft.Ayah Marar-Thinking About You.Am also looking forward to Rihanna's new album =))

Have not been to the cinemas for what feels like years.The last time was in August? or Sept I think? *gasps* yes.And hence I usually just dl the movies that I wanna watch years later.Hahahahahaa.

Special shout out to my bestie on the other side of the world.I love surprises and she never fails to give me one always.You know who you are.Miss you lots.Didnt know she still reads my blog here as she leads a crazy busy life there.Love you lots and take care there.XOXOXXOOXXOXOXO

The other bestie is now in Aussie.3 weeks of not hanging out =(((( She's my only partner in crime for shopping or eating good food.Which while I was going out to meet her last weekend my parents remark was: ''Your one and only friend'' =.= because I usually just hang out with her.Hahahaha.I cannot imagine if she goes to Aussie for a year to further her studies.I'm sooo not gonna have anyone.*cries* hahahahahaa.Anyways,enjoy your trip there.Shall await for your return!!! <3 p="p">


-with lots of love,peace out-

I care,therefore I am.... an idiot (?) , I dont know

In no way am I trying to brag or portray myself as someone who have it all or is like living the 'it' life or whatsoever.I have moments where my self-esteem about my appearance is like super super low.As many of you guys may have notice in my older posts.But I try not to portray it outside so much for I hate being vulnerable.I am an optimist.Hence,I always try to look at the brighter side of things.

What I don't get about some people is that,they know what trouble they have in trying to live a new and improved life.( I think they know it consciously since they are like able to talk about it?) It's the all talk and no action that pisses me off a bit.I'm a bit of an impatient and impulsive person.And I have this concept of if you want it and have the ability to go get it,do it.If you just sit around and wait or moan about it,nothings gonna happen and at the end of the day it will be you who will be filled with regret.Let me tell you,that is the last thing you wanna feel.it sucks big time.Why? Because you can't turn back time.So once its gone,it's gone.

If you want something and you know it requires you to change,or it's something outside your comfort zone,well if its for the good,why not just try it ? Everything comes with a price.Some things requires more sacrifice.At the end of the day,you may or may not be able to realize that sometimes it's worth it.

I dont know if it's me watching too much shows,or studying too much or something but taking things with an open mind and reminding oneself to look at things from both sides,the good and back of it helps a lot.Yes,it could lead to contradiction or indecisiveness.Try not to get drown in it.Try to come up with the best solution possible.It's not easy and you may not always come to a solution.But it's a good learning process in my opinion.

It's a simple thing really.I don't really like complication nor confrontations in my life.I usually try to look at things as simple as possible.And hence,some maybe of the opinion that I lead a simple,happy life without any worries or stress or whatsoever.Its far from it at times.I just usually choose not to display it on the outside and prefer writing it down,like in this blog or tweet about it.I dont like / am not good at expressing it out verbally at times.Plus,I do prefer to keep things towards myself at times,first trying to figure out a solution.

Gahhh.I dont know.I was fueled with annoyance to write this post.A voice within me is telling me I care too much and I dont know why. Is it even considered as care? or am I just a busybody? =((((

Ok.I dont wanna give a shit somemore.Tired of it...It's a wadte of my energy.I repeat and vow that I dont wanna give a shit about it anymore.

with lots of love (?),peace out-

Thoughts.

This thought just came into my week last week, 'Ahhh, Fakeness. Perhaps everyone has a certain level of it? It depends on how you present yourself to people / the world and how people interpret it.

I guess at times,I do fake it too.Some for courtesy purposes.I guess I'm too nice or unable to bring myself to show that I actually have a great dislike for that person? Now though,I try to stay away from the person I dislike as far as possible.It's better and healthier in my opinion.

I've written in one of the posts here before that it takes time for me to warm up to people.I'm generally perceived as a quiet person if you don't know me well.For e.g: if I do know you,but we're not close,or like have ever really spoke to each other,chances are I won't really say 'hi' to you when I meet you? maybe a slight smile.that's all.I think it's a bit of an ego/pride issue here? Like just in case I say 'hi' to you and you don't respond to it.Ohh.the embarassment.Also,I am afraid that you don't recognise/ actually know who I am.Hahahahaha.

I wonder at times,do I come on as arrogant due to my kinda 'cold' personality if you may.I get that a lot when I was in primary school.I do admit I was a miss-know-it-all.It's just that if I know something where I am 100% sure of that I'm right,I'll tell you straight on that,''this is it.that's the answer.I'm absolutely confident of it''And I guess the confidence came out as arrogance and that people actually hate me for it.After that,being humble and over the years,I prefer to just keep a low profile now.

Or people think that I'm fierce or just a plain nerd whom does not know anything other than reading/studying.

I hate being used.(who does right?) And I know how it feels.Experienced some directly and that feeling sucks.Hence,I tired not giving people that vibe.How does one define 'using somebody' ? Having thought about it,I realised it's a bit hard to come up with an answer.I feel (feel free to disagree with me) that we do use people everyday.It's just not over the extend of too much,you know what I mean? I'm not then implying that using someone is hence good, it's just don't use someone purely for your own advantage and when they're of no use to you,just drop them like a hot potato.I don't know about you,but my conscience does not feel right doing these kinda things.

I think too much don't I? It's not like I always have too much free time,just that from some daily encounters,people watching at train stations got me thinking.I write these thoughts down in a way as a reminder to me to practice what I preach (?) and I take it as something to change/improve myself for the better.
 p/s:stay strong mei quin!!!!! am always here supporting you!
-till then,with lots of love,peace out-

Happened // Happening Soon

Hello October.Time flies again.A lot of happenings had happened or will soon be happening! First off, a Birthday Shoutout to Phui Gi --Happy 21st!!!!!! It's not everyday you come to the day where you are regarded generally as an officially,(legally,and traditionally (?)) as an adult. =))

The King of Gold Bells is back to UK.Ahhh,the short moments where we attended classes together are fun and definitely to be missed ! *cries* All the best there,and I am bad at keeping in touch at times,but that does not mean that I don't care.*angel halo above the head* hehehehehe.

H&M have finally reached Malaysia.I was so excited to go for shopping.But the place was just so crowded that you lose the sense of excitement.I have to confess here also that I was a super kedekut shopper.Like I would really think twice,ok,more like a million times over before I buy stuff at first.I am worried that I'll regret it later on,or like it's not worth the money.I also weigh in the practicality of the items.Hence,I could go shopping the whole day and ended up not buying a single thing and then going home regretting at times.Gahhhhhhh.Also,tyhe stuffs that I came to feel in love with at times,is a bit pricey.Like a rm 150 or so flats from Topshop and a bag from Muji which is like rm 280 *le sigh* See,if I were to purchase these all in one day,of the burning smell in my wallet is sooo strong.But,I know,I know,I spend more willingly on concerts.Don't ask me why.I can't give a justified answer to this.COme to think of it,clothes,and shoes and  bags do last longer than concert.T.T Oh well.Ohh.I am also hunting for sneakers.Have yet to find a really really really nice one that I like.My Nike of 3 years ++ (the first sneakers I bought with my own money) is not really in its best condition.It's almost time to say goodbye.

I am tempted to buy a high top sneakers.Am targeting either from Adidas or Converse ( a red one.heh heh) but am in doubt one how often I would use them and feel I need a normal one also.Gahhh.See what I mean in me being a kedekut/shopper that thinks too much ?!! *cries*

Ok.I shall stop about my wants on shopping.I have chosen my subjects for the final hurdle.Jurisprudence and Company Law is both compulsory officially and unofficially.So that leaves me with 2.I find Succession interesting in its own way.So am torn in between Conflict and Intellectual Property ( IP ) .For I find both are interesting also.Final decision is: *drum rolls* Juris,Company,Succession and IP.I hope I made the right choice (i dont wanna ponder about this already) and God bless my friends and I all for our exams.

I'm still have not come up with a final decision/plan for Big Bang concert/Korea trip thing.Like how am I suppose to meet my sis and all that stuff.One thing for sure is that I think I might be attending both events.You know I don't like things to go to spontaneous or planned at last minute at times.But have not succeeded to have a ''serious'' talk about this with my sis =.=''''' And I am in a way,planning the itinerary for the Korea trip.The accommodation has been settle.Gahhh.sedikit stress on planning cos if its not enjoyable and stuff, it's gonna ruin the trip. So , fingers crossed on this.

Am excited to see Big Bang.It's like a dream finally coming true.Am of course a bit bummed that  I will not see the entire concert.But it's better than not seeing at all and  I hope (*prays*) I get to see them another time.Am also waiting for confirmation of 2ne1 having concert here a well. See there goes all my money.Hahaha.But I do hope I get to see them for I love them a lot.=))))

ok.enough rambling.this is a long post i think for I tend to just write and ramble on and on at times without realising how long the  post is gonna be.I think I talk/dramatized too much at times.Gahhh.it's a hard to change habit of mine i guess.

-till then,lots of  love,peace out-

Captured moments

New drink decoration by Ms.Sweet

''Innocently'' drinking alcoholic drinks with an out of this world cups.hahaha

using out of this world spoons.

eating maggi later.

Eating fest continues the next morning .

End product:Lasagne 

Some overdue pics from my phone of the last few hours of ms.sweet,ms.lee and I hanging out before she flies back to Scotland.Time passed by so freaking fast.Didnt take enough pics really.It's a combo of we forgot about it and us not being enough of a camera whore.Hahahahaha.But those uncaptured moments will still remain fresh in my (our) minds.( i hope) =))

-with lots of love,peace out-

Choices.Decisions.Let's Do This

It's finally started.I was calculating how long I have been commuting by the ktm to college.It's been 3years.Even my brain salutes myself for being to endure it.Time flies so fast.I see myself grow fatter,thinner,self-confidence being low from time to time about my face,the way I dress and the stuffs that I like and the way I look at things.

This it it.I can't believe I have reach the stage where I'm in my final year.Regrets about not working hard always happens after you got your results.But I know that I have no one else to blame but myself.Having not expecting to get high grades before the results are out helps a lot (for me) but then when you start hearing how well your peers do,the competitive/kiasu side of me gets the feeling of 'tak mahu kalah'.I used to try and not compare myself so much with others at times,but I'm only human and I can't help it.Not only in terms of grades,but in other stuffs as well.And then a voice inside of me tells me that I shouldn't that we're all different.

I dont want have to feel what regret and 'what ifs' again this time around.I can do this.I can endure this.I have the mental capacity and energy (hopefully enough of them) to do this.I am a believer of the words,'If you want something and have the ability to do it then go get it'.However,to want something at times requires sacrifice.You can't see it at times,it maybe in another form.It makes sense though as one can't have everything and not give up something in return.It wouldn't be fair if it is.I.can.do.this.

Classes have start.I'm in conflict as to which subject I want to take.Some said this is hard,that is easier,and then you hear opposite opinions on that.Lecturers is another influencing factor to me also.Hopefully by end of this week I can come up with a conclusive opinion.CJA fighting!!!

-with lots of love,peace out-

I guess its human nature

I dont know about you,but have you have moments where you get something you wished/hoped for,you then go on and want to have something more? To put it in another way,there is a certain amount of greed in all of us.It's just how consumed in it are we to really commit one of this 7 sins.

I have over the years not try to really compare myself in terms of grades specifically here to others.I hate it back then where my parents compare me and my high school friends.In college,they still do.I dont know if its cause they're teachers or something,but its irritating and hurtful for them to benchmark you against others at times.'You did good,but others was better-why are you not then?'

I have only tried not to think about others so much towards the end of my high school life.In college,I realised that there will always be people who are smarter than you,prettier and at times makes you feel that overall,that person is just better than you.At times where I am at my lowest,to describe myself in one word  (wholly not just on face value basis) would be me feeling ugly.Also,why am I not good enough?Yes.yes.moments of insecurities and low self-esteem.

Then I'll go why am i not good enough and all that drama and self-pitying and shit.At the end of the day though,if I want to life a life with that kinda thinking then i guess i would just not be happy being me.So,sometimes I do care how people perceive me.the words of a person telling me that i'm a goody two-shoes still rings in my head from time to time.And no,i did not take that as a compliment.I try not not give a shit much on what people think of me at times.You just can't please everyone.

Yea.I did a lot of waiting on Monday where I was waiting for the train and sorting my touch n go stuff at sentral.And so this thought s just came up and I stored it in my mind to blog about it,.Still working on how to further improve/change myself for the better,though its not easy I know.

My concept now is to give it all I've got,and if you have the ability to get/achieve it,go get it so that you wont live with regrets for you can't turn back time no matter how badly you wish for it at times.

Other than these kinda emo moments though,I am generally a happy,optimistic and simple,blur looking person.Who at times, my sister put it,only 'walks straight' and dont know how to look left or right at times =.=

-with lots of love,peace out-